Saturday, October 18, 2008

Code Adam

On Friday, I lost Calvin. Actually, Calvin intentionally lost me.

We had been running errands all day, bank, grocery store, gas station, Joann's, Half-Price Books, Fantastic Sam's etc. I had lost my patience at Fantastic Sam's. We were there for an hour and a half and Max received the worst haircut of his life. He has a mullet - it is appalling.

In Marshall's, I was walking down an aisle at the back of the store with four kids in tow. Looking behind me, I could see Calvin at the end of the row. I called his name and he gave me one of those mischievous smirks and ducked into the next row. Wearily, I walked back to where I had last seen him and sent Max, Sophie and Natalie down nearby rows to call for him. I knew what was going on - he was hiding in one of the clothing racks.

A very attentive salesperson heard us calling his name and anxiously asked if we were missing a child. I explained that he was most likely hiding in the racks but gave her a description "4 year old blond, bright orange pants, striped orange shirt and very yellow socks - no shoes". Thirty seconds later a booming voice comes over the loudspeaker "ALL ASSOCIATES TO THE FRONT OF THE STORE. WE HAVE A CODE ADAM. REPEAT, A CODE ADAM".

I am sure the sales associate thought I was a shockingly unworried mother as I continued to look in racks and call Calvin's name. I knew he was there somewhere, and by this time, other customers are looking for him as well. I was trying to look like a loving Mom, when really I wanted to use my mean mommy voice and yell "Calvin Scott Erickson, you get out here before I count to three or you are getting a spank!" About a minute later as I passed a rack of coats, Calvin jumped out and yelled "ta-da!" with a big smile on his face.


"ATTENTION ASSOCIATES, CODE ADAM HAS BEEN FOUND." I am buying a leash.

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